When There Are No More Words Left to Write

This is a rare week when schedules of three bibles studies collide. Three mornings, I’m busy from school drop off to after lunch. By that time, I’m tired and ready to take a nap.

This week, as well, I have been intent on actually taking the time to learn and take a class or two from the various places from which I still receive emails.

This is also the first time since consistently writing that I have messed up my schedule because I didn’t plan.

I missed it.

I missed getting out four posts this week.

But I’m here today because I have too much in my head, too much knowledge, too many opinions and endless stories that I wish to tell.

Boy, do I want to tell you stories. I have them, in my head. But I need them on paper. (Is this paper?)

And I want to improve. I want to be a better writer. I want to be a writer that people love (did I just say that out loud?) I want to be an author of books: children’s books, novels, and educational material. Yes, educational material because I have a lot of knowledge and there are people who need it.

I’ve flexed my writing muscles to write about creating your own career, fitness, motherhood and just to see if could, topics pitched by someone else.

So, I’ll keep writing until it’s all out of my head, until I have no more words left to say, until I cannot write anymore.

Until that happens, I hope to grow, adapt, learn and change.


 

This has been a Finish the Sentence Friday post. This week’s topic is “Sometimes, I wonder about my writing. I keep on and on because…” Feel free to adapt the sentence to “I write because…” or “I wonder why I write…

Your host is Kristi from Finding Ninee.

Finish the Sentence Friday is a link-up where writers and bloggers come together to share their themselves with a particular sentence. If you’d like to stay ahead of future sentences and participate, join our Facebook group.  Link up your sentence prompts over there and find some new friends!
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Clash of the Couples is HERE!

I’ve dreamed about being a writer all of my life. What I had not dreamed of was being married. That said, my marriage is relatively easy and laid back. We don’t argue much, rarely a word of disagreement is spoken… except in the most inopportune times. My story is about a road trip we took, where one of us was a sacrifice to the cause.

Please check out my writing debut in this awesome new anthology:

CLASH OF THE COUPLES!

Clash of the Couples is a new anthology featuring a collection of absurd lovers’ quarrels and relationship spats. Couples just starting their journeys and those who have been together “forever” will relate to dozens of short stories running the “one said, the other said” gamut—from disagreements over furniture, to who gets the last beer, to where to store the placenta (yes, you read that right).

Clash of the Couples2-01The book has been endorsed by a number of humor and publishing heavyweights, including Josh Blue, comedian and winner of NBC’s Last Comic Standing, and Abby Heugel, popular humorist and blogger at Abby Has Issues. Squeee! Look at what they had to say:

“If you’re looking for a fun read, check out Clash of the Couples. I could relate to the couples in this honest and hilarious collection of modern relationship tales. Clash of the Couples bursts with the real stuff that couples fight about and will make you laugh while shaking your head at the ridiculousness of it!” said Blue.

Heugel shares his sentiments. “Married, single, destined for spinsterhood—it doesn’t matter what angle you come at this book from, you will find something that you can relate to. And you will laugh, because even if you can’t relate to that particular situation, you’ll just be glad that it happened to somebody else.”

This is a huge day, and I’d love your help in making it a success. Here’s what you can do:

1) Buy a copy of the book! It’s available on Amazon and other retailers! If you do pick one up, THANK YOU!

2) If you received an Advanced Reader Copy (ARC) or beta review copy, please leave an honest review on Amazon and/or Goodreads. Be sure to mention at the end of your review that you did receive an advanced copy.

3) Ask your library or bookstore to order it! Don’t be shy! Mention the success of my other book The Mother of All Meltdowns (#1 parenting best seller; great review by Publisher’s Weekly).

4) Spread the word! Please tell your friends, colleagues, family, the guy at the toll gate—anyone and everyone—about the book!

5) Share it on social media—Facebook, Twitter, and so on. Use the hashtag ‪#‎ClashoftheCouples‬ to get retweeted or shared by a buttload of co-authors!

6) Instagram a picture of yourself holding the book for a chance to win a free copy! Remember to use the hashtag #ClashoftheCouples.

Thank you so much for all of your support!

Goodreads Book Giveaway

Clash of the Couples by Crystal Ponti

Clash of the Couples

by Crystal Ponti

Giveaway ends December 31, 2014.

See the giveaway details
at Goodreads.

Enter to win

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Ask, Don’t Assume

How many times in your marriage have you assumed your spouse knows what you want? Even after seven years of marriage, I still assume my husband knows my wants and needs, but that’s just not the case.

As much as we wish our spouses were mind-readers, often, they are clueless to our internal struggles. We wish they would just say “I know you’re hurting” but really they are wondering “I wonder what’s wrong with them.”

Sometimes, we have to open our mouths and say something in order to make sure that know.

Find more about what I think on the subject over at Marriage, Motherhood and Missions.

Don't Assume

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“We Make a Great Team Together” with Link up!

Summer has officially started in the 100lb Countdown household. Bunny has successfully completed 4th grade and I can finally breathe a sigh of relief for a more relaxed schedule. Overall, he has done well in school… and the struggles are for another post. He has asked consistently since my mother moved to South Carolina seven years ago to go and visit. This year is the first time that this was a possibility.

Getting him there was another story. As someone has who hasn’t had a consistent relationship with my mother, my husband was hesitant, to say the least. Since I knew the background, and I knew he knew the background, I had made the decision (after we agreed that he would go) that I would drive up my son alone and return. I’ve made the trip several times ~ no, not from here to SC, but from where I lived in LA to law school. They are approximately the same distance away.

However, the entire family here was against me making that drive alone.

And I was grateful for that. Who wants to drive seven hours alone?

What came next was surprising… my husband would be the one coming with me.

YES… I’m doing cartwheels in my head!

We get ready to go… and the hammer drops. I’m doing this because I don’t think my wife and child should be riding alone for that distance.

How noble of you!

After much discussion (as I said, we don’t really argue), he said that he was unhappy with this particular decision, but he couldn’t let me go alone. He wouldn’t want anyone to think he’d be ok with his children riding alone.

Well, not so noble.

He started to feel ill… coming down with whatever illness my Bee had the night before…during the drive. I drove the last two hours.

Upon our arrival, he was as nice and gracious as a sick person could be. We opted to stay in a hotel for comfort and to not spread the illness unnecessarily. He participated in everything, with a smile on his face (kinda, remember, he was still sick) and tried to enjoy it all while we went sightseeing and ate sushi for lunch.

After all was said and done, and we left my son to spend the next week with my mother, I thanked him for his good spirit. His response:

teamwork

With this, I know he’s got my back and through our discussions, he knows I have his. We are a great team. I love him so much for all of it!

 

Happy Fathers Day
Happy Father’s Day, hunny! I love you so much!

More on loving my husband here written way before this post was written!

dear-darling-husband

 

 

This has been added as a part of this week’s sentence… DEAR DAD…

FTSF

Please link up your family friendly posts below.

By linking up you’re giving us permission to use a picture from your linked up blog post should any host decide to feature your post.

We hope you’ll take a moment to stop by and say howdy to your MM&M Monday Link Up Co-Hosts!

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New Series: Marriage Moments

In honor of Father’s Day, I’m so excited to introduce a new series called Marriage Moments from Marriage, Motherhood and Missions!

MMM Button-300

Every day, there will be a prayer and a thought about marriage… to keep it going strong and loving each other. We started June 1st and we would love to have you join us!

Check us out!

 



 

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Letting the Mess Happen

I’ve wanted to join in Lanaya’s Letting Go series for since it started. But I was completely overwhelmed by well, not letting go of all the stuff I needed to do.

This week, I’ll start with Letting Go of Things Being Done My Way.

I didn’t have much growing up. Thankfully, I had full control of things that were “mine” in my house in my room. For the most part, my room was always clean and minimalistic. I don’t like a lot of stuff and knick-knacks. Don’t get me wrong, I think they’re beautiful, they are just extra things I need to clean and I HATE cleaning.

Not only do I hate cleaning, having kids doubles and triples all the work. I swear you can clean the house from top to bottom, then you leave the room to clean another room, and come back to what looks like a tornado hit it.

I mean.. how does the banister get dirty after it gets cleaned off? I really don’t get it. I can’t even explain it… but I clean it off, and somehow very quickly, it looks like this:

Banister

Quite frankly, I’m too lazy to clean it up a second time. Especially since I didn’t make the mess and I just cleaned it.o, I

But I need to get into letting go of getting angry when it’s time to clean up. My son, who’s 9, is in a rebellious stage of not wanting to do any cleaning, no matter how much of the mess is his. So, this week, I’m going to let go of getting frustrated for not jumping on the cleaning wagon especially during summer break.

What are you letting go of in your parenting?

Letting Go

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Story Untitled: Part I

It was 2007. We waited to get an ultrasound because my husband and I just started new jobs and needed our insurance to kick in to go to the doctor. When I finally did, I was already five months along.

We were excited. Because of the pregnancy, we had reassessed our life and our relationship and decided that we should take that next step into marriage.  With a pretty new ring on my finger, we went to the doctor together. Knowing I was so far along, my husband could find out the gender of the baby. I didn’t care.

The radiologist called my name. Nerves kicked in. I didn’t do this with my husband last time. This time, we were going in together. I felt good. I felt happy.

The radiologist seemed to take forever taking picture after picture. Then she had me move to the right. Then I had to move to the left. A weird look came over her face. Not quite a look of worry, but questioning one. The ultrasound was taking so long. I asked what the problem was.

She was blunt. “I can’t get a good picture of his heart.” What does that mean, I wondered. She continued, “It happens sometimes when the baby isn’t turned the right way. So, let me call the doctor real quick and I’ll be right back.”

My husband looked at me worried. He’s never worried. Or least doesn’t show it. I started to get concerned.

The radiologist returned and said that she is going to schedule an appointment in a couple of weeks, because the baby will grow and turn, and likely, she will be able to get that clear picture of the heart.

My husband and I felt better. We went home with a clear conscious, ready to return another day.

I returned a couple of weeks later. My husband had something at work, so he couldn’t take the time off to come with me. The radiologist took a bunch of pictures… but not nearly as many as last time. Her face fell. She said “I still can’t get a clear picture of the heart. I have to refer you to the high risk doctor. He’s been notified of the situation and you can see him soon. I’m sorry; I can’t tell you more right now.” She seemed to know the questions running through my head.

Because of the news, my husband made sure that he could attend that next appointment. I can’t even remember how far away it was from the first one. I just know I was a wreck. I was scared. Even the term “high risk” seemed scary. I had no idea what to expect.

When the appointment arrived, even it was a blur… I just remember being told that my son had hypoplastic left heart syndrome – a congenital heart defect that means that my son was only born with the right side of his heart of normal size. The left side (in easiest terms) was underdeveloped. He explained that there’s a good chance of survival in the womb. He didn’t have to work as hard, because my body was doing most of the work.

Hypoplastic Left Heart Syndrome

The numbers after birth were dismal. He would have approximately three surgeries – the first within a week of his birth; the second, around the time he turned seven; and third, around he turned fourteen. Although he could receive a heart transplant, hearts don’t grow at the same rate when transplanted, like say, the liver. At each surgery, the survival rate was 25%. The eldest children with HLHS (at the time) were in their late 20s – all of them female.

Needless to say, caring a child that you knew had a high likelihood of death is challenging. With a strong heart rate internally, you always feel strong, that this child will be one of the long term survivors. But we went along with our faith in God, that His will be done.

Besides extra testing, the rest of the pregnancy was a breeze. Alexander didn’t go home after birth. He was in the NeoNatal ICU for the first week, prior to having open heart surgery. He then spent the next four weeks in the hospital healing. I was on maternity leave, but my husband continued working. My older son Matthew, who’s now 9, but was 3 at the time stayed in the Ronald McDonald house.

Since we didn’t have any family help (they lived in Rancho/Fontana, but no offer of help), I had to stay at RMH during the day until my husband returned. I went to the hospital at night, and my husband went before he went to work. I breastfed him as much as I could, but pumped most of the time.

We were excited that we could finally take him home. He spent one week at home. We played, laughed and smiled. Then on the fourth day, he started refluxing his meds. Normal, kinda, so not much to think about. Then he slept through the night – at 6 weeks old. He slept 12 hours. I loved the idea, but something seemed off. Then his breathing got real shallow. The doctor told me to take him in. I did.

He was in a couple of days and all seemed good. All stats were increasing and/or steady. I went home to get some rest in bed when they said he could go home the next day. I needed a new change of clothes for him and me.

I came back the next day. I walked in the door. Said, “Hi, baby”, all his stats went to zero. No heart rate, no breaths, just buzzing came from all of the machines. The doctors and nurses rushed in, put a barrier up around him and ushered me and my mother in law to a private room. Where we waited. It seemed like an eternity. Someone came to check in with us every few minutes. With each person, I felt a glimmer of hope. There were times of revival, before he crashed again.

Until a half an hour later. His doctor came in. He said they could keep going, but after this long, even if there was a chance of survival, there would be extreme brain damage.

They stopped. They removed all the wires. The nurse ushered us into a room, where friends came and we sat with him for over three hours. Another nurse came in to offer to stamp hand prints and foot prints for me. I spent the entire time holding him.

It wasn’t until the nurse told us that he needed to get to the morgue to be processed if we were having an open casket that he would need to go that I even considered letting him go.

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How Do You Invite in the Spring Season?

See how I invite in the Spring over on Simply Helping Him for the Help Meet Corner.

SimplyHelpingHim
See my previous features at:
Loving Your Body, God’s Way  –  Women in the Bible ~ Influences

Don’t forget to check out my lovely sponsors – Raising Reagan, Janine’s Confessions of a Mommyholic, Pamela’s Heavenly Treats, The Fat Girl Fighting and The Gold Life… Links to the right!

Check out Shabby Apple’s new line:

Dresses from Shabby Apple
Buy 1 Fete de Fleurs and SAVE 40% on two select dresses using code: BOUQUET

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Tuesday Topics – Six Memories

Tuesdays Topics

Ah, memories. We have so many of them. But which ones should I choose?

1 – 2 – 3 – Births of my children

With D, I went into labor on a follow up appointment and ended up with an emergency c-section because of fetal distress. His heart rate dropped. I hated the anesthesiologist because he was worried about getting to the golf course instead of waiting for me to understand the difference between local and general anesthesia.

With A, I was determined to do a VBAC. I went into labor, then went into work because I knew my contractions weren’t strong enough. My colleagues forced me to the hospital and the hospital sent me home. I returned the next morning with much stronger contractions, was given pitocin, broke my water bag, caught a fever before receiving a second cesarean.

With B, I had given up on the idea of having a vaginal birth, scheduled the c-section. I remember waiting until it was over because my pregnancy was absolutely terrible. I couldn’t move, I was constantly exhausted and in pain. I couldn’t wait to hold her – outside my body. It was the first time my hubby was there and present the entire time, but I was so sick during the cesarean, I felt terrible.

4. My Marriage

I planned my wedding in 5 weeks. I was pregnant with A, and was determined not to have a second child out of wedlock. Because of the short notice, most of my husband’s family couldn’t make it. Otherwise it was perfect. Most of the gifts were a piece of the wedding – decorations, invitations, cake, etc. The only out of pocket costs were related to ME – dress, makeup, hair. I made my own veil. I loved almost every bit of it. The things that weren’t perfect, I’ll tell you another day.

5. College Graduation

I had so much promise and so much of my life was in front of me. I went to the Black graduation because my family could see me cross and the wait wasn’t forever, like the other four graduations that I could attend. The reason that this is such a memory is that we were each able to say a little phrase. I don’t remember exactly what I said, but it was something along the lines of… “This is just a stepping stone of bigger and better things.” I had no idea what to say. I actually think this is more graceful than what I said back then. I was told it wouldn’t matter because the applause would overwhelm the sound system. The problem is that between each person, the announcer waited until the crowd quieted to read the next card. If I had known, I would’ve at least tried to say something more profound, like my colleagues.

6. Finding out I was pregnant with D

Before my third year of law school, I found out that I was pregnant. Oddly, I was not scared, worried or disappointed. I wasn’t married, my now-husband was in school in Michigan, about to transfer to Georgia. I was comfortable and at peace. I’m not sure I would quite say I was happy considering the circumstances, but I felt good about being able to do it, on my own if need be. I think this memory sticks out because I think it’s the day I really became an adult. It was a decision outside of schooling and work life that I had to take complete responsibility not just for myself, but also for another human being. The decision changed my life and I’m grateful for it. My life is forever changed.

Want to join us? Check out

Tuesdays Topics

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Secret Santa Swap

This is the first time I have participated in an online Secret Santa Swap. This swap is organized by “Geek Can Be Chic” and I was paired up with another blogger from A Wish From Her. I conversed with the owner, Kim Saveley, who seemed genuinely nice and sweet. We exchanged a few details about ourselves to pick up gifts for the swap.

I was so excited to open my gift on Christmas morning! This bracelet was inside.

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Not only do I love the theme of the bracelet, which reiterates my life, it’s elastic so it doesn’t jangle or make noise.

There’s no way for her to know this, but one of the reasons I don’t wear jewelry is that it moves and I end up playing with it. Then I take it off, rarely to put it on again.

This bracelet is perfect for me.  Thank you so much Kim!

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