I’ll have to give myself a SMH with this post. I started it last week, and never published it. My mind is feeling warped from sleep deprivation, but I will have to push through.
Life passes so quickly. Friends and family are here one day and gone the next.
Since moving to Florida, the funeral announcements seem endless. Few are surprising, as ages are progressive to say the least. The age of their death assumes a full life, one of fulfilled promises and destinies met.
That’s not always the case.
The shame of it all is that dreams die, “life” gets in the way of living, and excuses become the norm.
Deaths are followed by begging or pleading for scraps to bury their dead. Families come together and pay, if they can.
If they can’t, public pleas of need are broadcast through Kickstarter accounts, selling personal items, even selling chicken dinners on the street corner.
And that’s just a shame.
It’s a shame that, in a family’s time of grief, they have to worry about how to lay their loved one to rest.
It’s a shame that the family member didn’t have any type of insurance policy to cover the funeral costs.
It’s a shame that the lack of planning is prevalent in lower income communities.
It’s a shame that funeral homes and cemeteries have a reputation for gouging the grieving.
That can change… there is light.
The light isn’t sexy or even bright. It’s simple really… planning and foresight. Even moreso, there is light in the now, knowing you can make different choices today.
Knowing this, I am looking forward to my future, seeing my light starting now. My light is in seizing my present, making changes today that will affect our future. For that opportunity, I am thankful.
My husband and I have embarked on a new body care line, starting with a foot cream and body scrub. We are pleased to announce our new product, a hand and body scrub:
Privacy is a value that I hold dear. As much as I let the world in, I keep a lot to myself. The fear of judgment and ridicule is scary and vulnerable. As I’m reaching outside my comfort zone, I know I have to be open and honest to let you, my reader in, for you to relate to me. I’m not snarky or funny, and I’m struggling to find comfort in just being me.
Today, I’m going to start letting that go, and it’s less for you than for me. Honesty, holds me back in my real life too. I know I make plenty of mistakes, but I fear sharing them.
Here, I’m going to put forth my goals, openly and honestly:
- I want to lose 20 pounds this month. A lofty goal, but perfectly attainable if I do what I’m supposed to do. I’m currently 217 pounds, so I would love to hit the under 200 mark by the end of the month.
- I need to earn $500 this month. I am traveling to California for the second time this year. I need to contribute substantially since I do not have an income of my own. I would love if you could show any support by listening to my podcast, choosing Exumas Isle as a product line, or purchasing anything from Amazon (bookmark it too!).
- I need to get organized. Some look and see organization in my home, as everything is put away, yet I see a hot mess. I want to have everything in its place. I get so frustrated when things are in disarray. I also get overwhelmed and are slow to clean them because I find it stressful to do otherwise. Counterproductive, I know.
We’ve completed a dozen episodes of Run Your World, a podcast. We are finding our way and enjoying each step. I’m thankful to have a partner that has the same vision and is willing to put in the work to get us there.
As I understand all of the endeavors that I have thrown myself into, I have to be thankful for the opportunities that are around me, my ability to take them on and my willingness to do them.
To piggy back on that, I am very thankful that I have been able to focus, over the last couple of weeks, on making sure that my children sleep in their own bed for the entire night. We still have some hiccups, like last night when Butterfly decided at 2 a.m. that she did not want to go back to sleep. We are still making progress, in general, more recent nights are better than the previous.
This school year, I’ve embarked on homeschooling my preschoolers and so far, I’ve been successful. Every day, we learn a new word, a new sound. I’m thankful to have children so excited to learn. Even Butterfly, not quite two, is learning her alphabet and numbers by sight, her shapes and we’re working hard on her colors. Bee is working on reading, pronouncing each letter and delivering a complete word.
I’m surprised at how often we are being craftsy. I’m thankful that I’ve been able to let go of control, to be neat and clean and to avoid messes at all costs. We still have not, and will not, utilize play dough, but otherwise, we’ve made lots of art projects.
Bunny is another story, as he is entering middle school, my frustration level increases. Please pray for patience so I don’t lose it on him… again.
This week’s words are Light and Shame.
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