Judging Dad ~ Relationships #InTheRaw

Home / Family / Judging Dad ~ Relationships #InTheRaw

Relationships in the Raw is a series that I created to discuss difficult relationships. When I was dealing with family issues, I felt there was no one to talk to help me through and see the other side. I hope this series finds those who feel alone. Feel free to read more entries or add your own

After my first post, I had an influx of responses. Some came as emails, responses on Facebook and comments. Here is one of those responses:

Relationships in the Raw

Thank you for sharing your story.I am grateful that I had such a great relationship with my mom – I loved her so much and she was always a huge support system for me {of course we had our moments, everyone does}. Sadly, she passed away 6 months ago, it still doesn’t feel real that she’s gone.

But my relationship with my dad is the complete opposite.

I love my dad. My parents divorced when I was 7. Rather quickly, he got involved with someone else and ended up moving out of our city.

This changed everything.

The woman became my stepmom.

Our relationship struggled throughout my childhood, I never felt like I got enough attention or saw him enough. As I got older, a lot of judgments were placed upon me about who I was, what I did, what I believed in, etc.

It only got worse after I became a mom. I tried for so many years to make my dad “love” me and get him to want to be part of my life. But it just didn’t happen.

This last year was huge for me – my mom got sick, life got real really fast and I realized I was tired of being a disappointment to my dad. A wise friend of mine said to me –

“Relationships are about relating in love, respect, compassion, and honesty … without judgments.” Share on Twitter

I realized my dad and I are on two different frequencies. We love each other, but we do not relate to each other. He helped bring me into this world, but he’s living in an old mindset, a different level of consciousness. I decided to stop accepting his projections of me and stay true to me. I forgive him, and love him and have compassion for him.

There is more to life. I was tired of feeling unloved and like a failure in his eyes and drained from trying so hard. Letting go is NOT easy at all, but I had to make that choice for me and my family. I didn’t want my girls wondering why he’s never around. My youngest doesn’t even know my dad or stepmom.

The “relationship” we had didn’t serve me, didn’t help me grow and didn’t make me happy, so I chose to let go and move on.

About the Author: Happy Wife, Mom of 2 Beautiful Girls, Blogger + Chocolate Lover

Thanks for sharing!

Do you have a story to share? Feel free to email me or anonymously submit it HERE.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.